Putin/Trump Productions “From Russia with Love” Sequel

(Because apparently the Cold War needed a reboot)

In 2015, Vladimir “Vladdy Your Daddy” Putin purchased the rights to produce a sequel to From Russia with Love. As director and executive producer, Vladdy immediately set out to craft the plot, assemble the cast, and hire a production team brave enough — or desperate enough — to work for him.

The storyline? Pure revenge fantasy. Vladdy wanted payback against Hillary Clinton for publicly pointing out corruption in Russia’s last presidential election — the one he “won” with all the grace of a drunk moose on roller skates.

Naturally, the James Bond character was replaced by a fictional narcissist, congenital liar, misogynist, serial adulterer, admitted sexual assaulter, and deadbeat real‑estate developer. This new “hero”would team up with Vladdy in his vindictive quest to get even with Hillary.

A bold creative choice. Bold like deep‑frying a Pop‑Tart.

With the advice and consent of Donald “Trumporleone” Trump (hereinafter “The Don”) — and with the able assistance of U.S. Attorney General Todd Blanche — Vladdy assembled the following cast and production team.

????Starring Cast

Daniel Tosh — leading actor as Donald Trump

Rosie O’Donnell — leading actress as The Don’s main squeeze

Stephen Miller — supporting actor as The Don’s consigliere

Ann Coulter — supporting actress as Agent Don’s former squeeze

????Production Team

Directed by: Kim Jong‑un

Produced by: Vladimir “Big Daddy Vladdy” Putin

Screenplay by: David Duke

Story by: Sean Hannity

Music by: 50 Cent

Distributed by: Larry Flynt Enterprises

Rumor has it — from sources who probably shouldn’t be trusted with a toaster — that the proceeds from the movie will be donated as bribes (sorry, condolence payments) to the survivors of Jeffrey Epstein, Ghislaine Maxwell, and the assorted “humanitarians” they associated with.

Big Daddy Vladdy’s altruism, combined with his compassion, should — assuming the porn stars at the Kremlin and the White House are properly aligned by competency — earn him a nomination for the annual Mother Teresa Memorial Award for Social Justice.

Or maybe the Sister Sledge Lifetime Achievement Trophy for Synchronized Chaos.

Hard to say. Premature menopause and dementia keep interrupting the judging panel.

The anticipation is killing me. The first showing of the movie will be held at one of LA’s finest porn theaters on the Sunset Strip — two days before the November 3, 2026 midterm elections.

That should really harden voter interest and boost turnout on the third, right.