| ► Attorney ad for David Pheils, E.J. Leizerman & Marshall Wisniewski of Toledo |
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Attorney advertisement for David Pheils, E.J. Leizerman and Marshall Wisniewski of Toledo
Hi, boys and girls, my name is David Pheils, Jr. (a.k.a. "THE MOLE") and I'm an attorney in Perrysburg, Ohio along with my fellow crooked attorney Marshall D. Wisniewski and E.J. Leizerman.
I and Marshall Wisniewski and our longtime associate (signifant other) attorney E.J. Leizerman of Toledo, Nashville and Detroit have admittedly dedicated our legal careers to screwing everyone who has ever been ignorant enough to seek our legal assistance.
Hey folks, I know and fully appreciate how difficult it is to find a really dishonest/corrupt attorney in the greater Toledo, Ohio area that will mistreat (screw) you fairly. That's why I and my associate’s E. J. Leizerman are more than willing to contractually agree to give you the screwing you so richly deserve. Hey folks, don't we as attorneys have the "god-given" right to screw you?
I and my significant other, attorney E. J. Leizerman are confident that you will never find any other attorney in Northwest Ohio, Detroit and/or Nashville who is willing to be as dishonest as we are now and have been for many, many, many years in knowingly and cheerfully screwing our clients in an effort to unjustly enrich ourselves.
Have you ever been "screwed" by a dishonest attorney? Well, if you hire me, E. J. Leizerman and/or Marshall Wisniewski, you’ll really find out what it means to be "roally"screwed.
I would respectfully suggest that prior to hiring me and/or my fellow cohorts, E. J. Leizerman or Marshall D. Wisniewski that you might want to consider purchasing an “inversed chastity belt.”
Being the acknowledged compassionate crooks and degenerates that we admittedly are (that’d be me, E. J. Leizerman and Marshall Wisniewski), we offer a 1.2% upfront, cash discount on the costs you’ll incur to purchase (a) an inversed chastity belt, (b) yearly supply of Preparation H, (c) 140 industrial strength tubes of K-Y Jelly, (d) 50 gallon drums of Vaseline and/or (e) an equivalent prophylactics device upon employing us.
Conclusion
We (that’d be attorneys David Pheils, E. J. Leizerman and/or Marshall Wisniewski) eagerly await your prompt response if you’re looking for a good ol’ fashioned screwing.
The moniker “The Mole” was appropriately, affectionately and deservedly bestowed upon me by my fellow members of the Legal Industry in Northwestern Ohio after I personally oversaw the development of an underground home that would be resistant to incoming and expected grenades and/or missiles from the untold victims of the corrupt practices engaged in by me and my partners/associates (significant others) attorneys E. J. Leizerman and/or Marshall D. Wisniewski of Toledo, Ohio.
Suffice it to say that I and my partners (significant others) such as attorneys E. J. Leizerman, Marshall Wisniewski and/or disbarred attorney (deservedly so I must admit) Dale R. Crandall are anxiously awaiting to provide you with the screwing you so richly deserve.
When making queries of some of the victims of attorney David Pheils’, E. J. Leizerman and/or Marshall Wisniewski’s outlandish and unconscionable victimization of their prior clients, an elderly victim responded in the manner depicted to the right.
As they say, a picture is worth a “thousand words,” need I and/or the victim portrayed say more?
If you’ve been screwed by attorneys David R.Pheils, Jr., E. J. Leizerman, Marshall D. Wisniewski and/or Dale R. Crandall please drop me a line at
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