| ► Today’s Public Official Misfit is: John J. Carroll of Cleveland, Ohio |
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Today’s Public Official Misfit is: John J. Carroll of Cleveland, Ohio Today’s Misfit John J. Carroll has been charged with public corruption, bid-rigging, bribery and faking cost overruns to fund a lavish lifestyle. Cool!!!
John J. Carroll was the former vice president of a county-owned hospital in Cleveland. Johnny Baby was paid a paltry salary of $195,000 a year, which an unreliable source said was less than half the annual median family income in greater Cleveland. Golly gee whillikers and goshes and gollies, if true my move to Sacramento from Columbus wasn’t wise, right?
When I first learned that John J. Carroll was being paid a measly $195,000 a year, this heart-wrenching news caused me to immediately exit my office and travel to an adjoining room and fetch me a dry towel.
 Examples of the bribes that Johnny Baby solicited and received are:
1. Patio furniture
2. A Sauna for da house
3. Scuba diving lessons
4. Several computers
5. A refrigerator (for safekeeping of cash bribes)
6. A washer, dryer and refrigerator
7. Tree removal services
Johnny’s bribes included lavish vacation trips to exotic venues such as France, Italy, Japan, Singapore, India, the Netherlands (Cleveland Plain Dealer – Rachel Dissell), Bowling Green, Kentucky and Compton, California. Johnny also solicited bribes for loge seats, concert and sporting events, golf outings at private country clubs, expensive meals and annual check-ups with a Cleveland proctologist. John also was charged with filing false tax returns and lying to the FBI.
In one instance, Johnny commanded Mr. Patel to cater a lunch for a group of Metro-Health employees. In his June 2006 email to Mr. Patel, Johnny said, “No cold cuts (reserve that for losers/taxpayers funding this bribe). Ribs and chicken, with some corn on the cob will do.” (Cleveland Plain Dealer)
In addition, one of Johnny’s crooked assistants (was there another kind?) received bribes consisting of landscaping services, jewelry and gift cards. (Cleveland Plain Dealer – James McCarty)
The altruistic bribes (is there another kind?) of about $600,000 that Johnny solicited came from Nilesh Patel, an executive at East-West (we da best!) Construction, Inc. located in Cleveland.
Me thinks that Chuck Berry had Johnny in mind when he penned that ol’ ditty “Johnny B Goode,” which went something like this:
Go Johnny go, go
He used to carry his bribes in a gunny sack
Go sit beneath the tree by the railroad track (in the Flats)
Oh, the bribers would see him sitting in the shade
Strumming with the rhythm that the bribers made
People passing by they would stop and say
Oh my that little crooked boy could play
Johnny’s conduct in failing to offer other contractors in Cleveland the opportunity to submit competitive bribes was in my opinion a violation of the due pr
 ocess clause (equal protection) of the US and Ohio Constitutions. For an explanation of how non-competitive bribery violates the due process clause of the Constitution I invite to review the article titled: "Judicial Bribery and Due Process" at http://tinyurl.com/ms3vmb. In an effort to prevent this type of conduct occurring in the future, Mark Moran, president of Metro-Health said the hospital has revamped its process of accepting bribes, I’m sorry I mean doing business and promised more competitive bidding (due process). Mr. Moran went on to say, “The idea that one contractor got $50 million of our business is not going to happen in the future.” (Cleveland Plain Dealer) An unreliable source indicated that Mr. Moran followed up by saying, “Contracts to one contractor will now be limited to $49,999,999.99.”
It's pretty obvious that Johnny is a certifiable moron in that he left a paper trail (email communications, etc.), among other things that any aspiring crook should have recognized would to his criminal conduct being uncovered. According to the Cleveland Plain Dealer, Johnny Baby could get as much as ten-years in the joint. If he does and I'm pulling for him, and if he's sent to the prison in Lucasville, then he may well be assigned to cell No. 764, which means he'll be a cellmate of Josephine (name used to be Joseph).
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