► US Sen. John Cornyn – Texas’ No. 1 Individual Santa Claus Award Winner Print E-mail

US Sen. John Cornyn – Texas’ No. 1 Individual Santa Claus Award Winner

 
US Senator John Cornyn
 
Texas’ No. 1 Individual Santa Claus Award Winner
 
Senator John Cornyn gives a new meaning to altruistic Christmas Giving. As you'll see below, Johnnie found it acceptable to play Santa with contributor funds. Of course it goes without saying that his donors were unaware of Santa's conduct. Do ya think Santa ever sought authorization from his benefactors before he made these outrageous expenditures?  Of course he didn't!!  After all, he's Santa, right?
 
While sitting as the Texas Attorney General, Johnnie spent his contributor’s contributions to make the following “individual” gifts:
  • $17,311.50 on 12/13/01 at Ben Silver Corp. in Charleston, SC
  • $7,727.00 on 12/29/00 at Tiffany’s in Dallas (your favorite store, right?)
Santa’s campaign records do not disclose the name of the lucky boy or girl who received these gifts. I’m sure that Santa (that’d be Johnnie) spent a great deal of time on the taxpayer’s dime vetting (FYI John, it means evaluating) who was “naughty and who was nice” before he made a legal determination of who was the most deserving person.
 
I wonder if Santa advised the recipients of these two (2) gifts costing $25,038 that he didn’t expend one nickel of his personal funds. I’m sure he didn’t disclose this fact, right? However, I’m confident that Santa was more than happy to accept the gratitude from these two folks.
 
In addition to being Texas’ No. 1 Santa Claus, Johnnie is also a contender for Texas’ Arrogance Award for spending over $28,000 of campaign funds for an oil portrait of himself.
 
Goshes and Gollies and Gee Whillickers, one can only surmise (FYI Johnnie, means speculate) the manner in which Santa will dispense with his contributors funds in the future. Go Jonnie, Go!!!
 
An unreliable source indicated the Sen. Cornyn was the inspiration for Chuck Berry when he wrote that old ditty “Johnny B Goode.” In fact, the source further indicated that Cornyn may have inspired Chuck to write “My Ding-a-Ling.” The lyrics that Chuck apparently wrote with Cornyn in mind are as follows:
 
Go Johnny go
Go go go Johnny go
Go go go Johnny go
Go go go Johnny go
Go, Johnny B. Goode
 
He used to carry his lawbook in a gunny sack
Go sit beneath the tree by the railroad track
Oh, the lawyers would see him sitting in the shade
Strumming with the rhythm that his donors made
People passing by they would stop and say
Oh my that little country boy could play
 
Go Johnny go
Go go go Johnny go
Go go go Johnny go
Go go go Johnny go
Go, Johnny B. Goode
 
 
 
 
 

 
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