► Carly Fiorina: Today’s “Ass-Kisser” Award Winner Print E-mail

Carly Fiorina: Today’s “Ass-Kisser” Award Winner


Congratulations to….


Carly Fiorina

Today’s “Ass-Kisser” Award Winner


This isn’t the first opinion written about Carly. In the past, she has been the recipient of one (1) opinion. That opinion is listed at the end of this article and can be viewed by going to the listed category.


The billionaire Koch Brothers recently (late July 2015) sponsored an event at a lush resort at Dana Point, California which was attended by other like-minded billionaires. Carly was one of several GOP presidential attendees that were invited to kiss the Koch Brothers rings and derrieres.


In an embarrassing attempt to further establish her bona fides as one of the GOP’s Premier Ass-Kissers, Carly, after donning a pair of Industrial Strength Knee Pads, spewed forth the following brown-nosing comments:

  • “These are people who care deeply about our nation.”
  • “The foundation that the Koch brothers have built has invested in the power of ideas.”
  • “They’ve invested in the power of lifting people up.”

The only people the Koch brothers are interested in lifting up is the Koch brothers. Only someone with an I.Q. just a tad higher then the legal speed limit in a school zone would believe that the Koch’s care deeply about our nation


Carly has the chutzpah to claim that the next president should be someone with a background in business. Of course Carly’s business experience was as CEO of Hewlett-Packard. A few of Carly’s outstanding accomplishments as CEO are as follows:

  • HP stock price fell by 50%
  • HP board of directors forced Carly to resign
  • News of her firing caused an increase in HP stock of $3 billion
  • HP debt rose from $4.25 billion to $6.75 billion

It is plainly clear that Carly knows for a fact that she has absolutely no chance of winning the GOP presidential nomination. In truth, she’s hoping that the eventual winner will decided to pick her as his Vice-Presidential candidate so that there will be a woman on the ticket in a race against Hillary Clinton.


Congrats Carly; keep up the good work! We should let everyone know of your amazing record as one of Americas Least Appreciated “Ass-Kissers”; you are far too humble.


Comedians running for GOP Presidential Nomination: Art. 72 Dawg Opinions

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